come again soon.

2008.
in one word- FUCKING AWESOME!!


well, it’s finally 2009 and like the song goes “well this is the new year and i don’t feel any different..”. And i bet everyone i know is probably out at Vudu now partying and i’m home blogging. how delightful. :/

james tried to call me “daw” several times but then he couldn’t get through and it’s such a shame cuz i was so excited to great him and i just really missed him. i can’t wait til he gets home. which is hopefully soon.

as tradition, on the first day of the year i don’t sleep until 4 am because i like to stay up and blog about the year that has passed and i’m proud to say that this is probably my 4th or 5th consequtive year to do so. at first it started as the “longest blog ever” but then i just could NOT live up to that. it’s just too much work. so now i just like to sum up the year and then make wishes for the new year.

hence.

firsts first:

today i am happy because we went to sm to buy make up. you see lately, i’ve been watching “how to’s” on youtube and idk out of nowhere my girly side emerged and i’ve been dying to try out the tutorials.

i am also happy because i spent the new year with my family. this makes me happy because i’ve realized that in a few years i might not be able to even celebrate cuz i’ll probably have to work then.


to sum up the year 2008, i’d have to say it was pretty awesome. i mean despite all the fucked up things that has happened like with me and james and with me and my dad and his family, i’ve been soo blessed this year. truly blessed.

so let’s start with a survey that i’ve apparently been answering for 3 years.

new answers start after the + sign. thank you.

007/008/ 009 survey

1.Will you be looking for a new job?
– i will try to find another way to make money so, yeah, i guess.

* uhm, i think i’ll just add whatever i can think of aside from selling munchkins cuz i can’t do that in COLLEGE. so yeah, maybe. i’m always trying to find different ways to make money anyways. lmao.

+ no. i see myself as a nurse now. amazingly. yeah, i am as SHOCKED as you are.

2. Will you be looking for a new relationship?
– i don’t know if i wanna put myself in a “serious relationship” situation or if i like playing around. so, rightnow, i think i’ll take whatever comes.

^ i think i’m AWESOME! hahaha.

* no. i’m happy with the one i’m in now.

+ no. i love having a boyfriend. and most of all, i love james.

no matter what.


3. New house?
– hopefully. i wanna go back to apas.:(

* god knows how much i want to.

+ oh god. i wish!

4. What will you do different in 07?
– i will embrace everyday. i won’t let too many things pass me by and i will take more chances. that means, find the guts to sneak out.

^ i did sneak out ONCE. but i got caught. and i DID take more chances.
i fell inlove and fought for it. yipeee.

* this year, i’m going to live more. appreciate more, curse LESS, for once in my life i will be OPTIMISTIC!, care more, earn more,
continue to take more chances, pay more attention, learn to listen, control my temper better, love more, pray more, fight for myself more, be more independent, be better, be stronger, be smarter, be more responsible, PARTY MORE!, mean what i say more and i will not forget to ALWAYS BE REAL.
dami.

+ this year, i’m going to focus on my studies and try my best to be a better girlfriend. i just realized that maybe the reasons why i was such a bad gf to james is because i’m selfish. i’ll try to change that. but then again, it’s hard to break old habits ;]


5. New Years resolution?
– not to slouch
not to write on myself
wear more colors
embrace things more
etc. etc.

^ pffft.

* i don’t have any this year.

+ oh, you just have to wait for that. 😀

6. What will you not be doing in 07?
– kissing random boys.

^ AMEN!

* running away from home, getting into HUGE fights with james, slipping away from my friends, having PMS, cursing as much, loosing/ wasting money

+ all the things i said i wouldn’t do last year. hehe

7. Any trips planned?
– moal boal. but knowing my mother, that won’t push through!

^ did i go, ba? don’t remember. lmao.

* none so far.

+ anywhere. hopefully out of the country. 🙂

8. Wedding plans?
– aunt debbie

^ that i didn’t even bother to go to.

* mine
[because i’ll be turning 18 this year and i’m positive about wanting to marry James] HAHA

+ hopefully none of my friends.

9. Major thing on your calendar?
– PROM!

^HAHA. LOOK HOW FUCKED UP THAT TURNED OUT FOR YOU!

* GRADUATION!!!

+ the end of my first year of COLLEGE!

10. What can’t you wait for?
– summer and sinulog and mega parties.

* graduating, college, being 18, being able to party like a wild monkey and hopefully having a REALLY nice year with james.

+ good times. a life worth living. success in school.

11. What would you like to see happen differently?
– the player falling for the princess and the princess not catching him.

* my relationship with my family. i just want PEACE.

+ my papa’s health fully restored.

12. What about yourself will you be changing?
– a l o t

* a l o t

+ a lot

13. What happened in 06/ 07/ 08 that you didnt think would ever happen?
– HAHA. a lot!

* GOD. first, having a REAL boyfriend, leaving the house, maintaining my grades.

+ being hit by james…


14. Will you be nicer to the people you care about?
– uhm .. i have to think about it.

^ once again, i am AWESOME.

* yes. especially to my papa and to james.

+ oh yes

15. Will you dress differently this year than you did in 06/ 07/ 08?
– i hope i gain some fashion sense this year!

* if i can afford to then, why not?

+ i can FINALLY afford to so yes, it will.

16. Will you start or quit smoking?
– i might start. but i don’t see myself as a smoker, really.

*if i wasn’t so darn committed to my boyfriend, i’d start.

+ occassionally.

17. Will you better your relationship with your family?
– no. i don’t know. i just want my mm to shut up.

^ this’ll never happen.

* yeah, i’ll try.

+ so far,i wouldn’t change anything. i like how my relationship with my family is na

18. Will you do charity work?
– YES!

* yeah, it’s my humble pie. :]

+ maybe not.

19. Will you go to bars?
– yeah. i want to. i soo want to!

* yep. more frequently.

+ not as much as i would’ve wanted to.

20. Will you be nice to people you dont know?
– not that i’m ever mean to them but ok…

* yeah, i will. and i’ll spread somma that niceness on james.

+ no. people annoy me now.

21. Do you expect 07 to be a good year for you?
– i hope it will. i just want a good, fun year.

* yeah, i do.

+ yes, i do.

22. How much did you change from this time last year til now?
– i changed.

* oh so much. i can’t even believe i was so much more hate the world than i already am last year.

+ things have definetely changed, my friend.

now i’d like to think i’m more focused [!?] yet i’m also very much in vain.

23. Do you plan on having a child?
– hell no.

* still, no.

+ oh jesus, no.

24. Will you still be friends with the same people you are friends with?
– not all.

* most of them.

+ yes.

25. Major lifestyle changes?
– maybe. i wanna be a party girl. lol

* SEE JAMES!!!!
not major. oh, maybe major. i still wanna be a party girl. i want my boyfriend to be my best accessory during those times. i just want to be fabulous. [but i’ll have to be RICH first. haha]

+ yeah. maybe i’ll hang out with my friends more.

26. Will you be moving?
– hope so

* doubt it.

+ no, don’t think so.

27. What will you make sure doesn’t happen 07?
– giving away confetti

* giving away confetti. and the bad fights. and failing college or not fitting in it.
and forgetting who my friends are or who i am and my values and the Lord.

+ loosing my confetti. and loosing james.

28. What are your New Years Eve plans?
– it’s new year naman gani and im answering this. geez

* it passed already.

+ to stay up!

29. Will you have someone to kiss at midnight?
– that happens?!

* unta. but yeah.

+ no 😦

30. One wish for 07/ 08?
– that i would just have a good year. last year screwed me badd.

+ to learn from my past experiences and put them into good works.

january:

it’s always good to start your year surrounded by friends and i know i spent my first month pretty well cuz Bayot was home from new zealand and it was the first sinulog i spent out the whole night with friends AND james. god, i remember i was so tired that night and it was so whacked cuz we even tried to get a STRIP club but i just couldn’t do it. lmao.

i also remember that on sinulog me and james had to bring my huge bag of clothes around with us everywhere but it was sweet though cuz james took so much care of me that day. and in the evening, we cooked eggs. i remember that.

nina’s party was pretty awesome, too. crazy night. ;]

February:

VALENTINES! the best valentines of my whole life. ❤ i will never forget february for soo many reasons. mainly..

1. because of what james did for me on the 14th. 🙂

2. because i had prom! and the best prom ever, too. i was so lucky i got to wear my dream dress that cost us 5k. 2008 was really good to me!


3. because i got dengue 😦


March:

i think i was the happiest girl in the world during march cuz HIGH SCHOOL FINALLY ENDED and god was i happy that shithole was over.

high school wasn’t bad. i mean, i wasn’t a loser or anything so i don’t have any reasons to hate it but idk. moving forward just felt so good. and the best thing about graduation is that i didn’t just graduate but i graduated with an AWARD! but then it was the lamest. i got best in sports. harhar. 2008 was good to me indeed.


April:

april was good for me for 2 reasons.

1. cuz me and james turned 1 year on april 27.

2. cuz it was james’s first birthday that he got to spend with me and i was sp happy to throw him a party. a SUPRISE birthday party and the best thing about it all- it was his FIRST party ever. but i know there was some drama in between that but nevertheless.


and according to my files. april was also the time i won my 3rd championship in tennis 😀 yey me.

[layla’s 18th]

may:

oooh. may was awesome for me! i got my braces! [i know some people would dread this but then it was good for me cuz i always peeved about my crooked teeth and now they’re almost perfect. goody!]


i went to tuburan with just my friends, i got my new pets- chaka and cheeky [chicks. RIP] and my rabbits jumper and venom. venom died though but jumper is doing fine. she’s obese 😀

[jumper]

and what else? idk.

june:

start of college! oh god. june was kinda bad for me though cuz i was so fresh and everything was just really hard for me. hard for james too. i just lost so much once college started.

as for making new friends- now i have lesser friends than with what i started with. all my classmates are just difficult.

my camera got busted around june or july so i probably don’t have that many pictures to post na..

boy/ girl challenge? that’s a BOY.

july:

all i remember from july is getting a birthday gift for my mom that made her cry. hahaha.

august:

school consumed. August sucked cuz i couldn’t even go to chabels party cuz i got into free step dance team which btw, SUCKS and i had to dance. it wasn’t worth it.

september:
i realy don’t remember… maybe me and james broke up. most likely. september wasn’t that good.

oooh, now i remember. september was no good. me and my dad fought and are still fighting and it’s not going to end..

october:
oh yes, october. i am very lucky for october. first cuz cielo came home from the states and we went to nailon with james, ben, arden and nikki and had so much fun!!

second cuz i had an AWESOME 18th party! god, i am so lucky for this gyud. it was so awesome and it cost a lot too. i honestly did not deserve this but god was kind enough to bless me and i’m so happy for this god. best thing that happened to me so far.

and another thing that happened on october, james and i got back together and he ever got down on his knees and gave me a gold necklace for my birthday. i wear it on specia occasions. like during my party 😀

november:
somehow i just remember november as being very stressful. it was the start of the second semester which was very difficult.

december:
[hope’s party where i was OVER dressed]

december was good to me. i got really awesome gifts including a bank account from my dad and i get 4k a month which is my own personal money and i love it.

i got a tamaguchi, hamsters [which i love], make up and clothes.

james left for singapore though and that made me lonely but despite all these things i am grateful.

and that more or less sums up my 2008.
i know that there were many times during this year that i was groveling and moping and i know that all these reasons where cuz of me. me and james weren’t really in good terms for so long and i’m to blame for that. i lost touch with most of my friends because i gave james too much of my time and i’m also the one to blame for that.
there were times when i slacked off in school because i let my personal problems take hold of me and i blame myself for that. but that’s life. i’m glad to say “i’ve learned”

and the BEST part of this year is that…

i am OFFICIALLY, by law, on legal paper JEAN LOUISE I. PEREZ. Alvin Chua, you can EAT SHIT!


and so for new years resolution’s here’s mine in accordance to “this diary will change your life 2009” [benrick.co.uk] yes, i have the book..

1. to grow up to 6″.
2. to achieve COMPLETE world peace.
3. to gain an ass.
4. to somehow find a way that Syrian and Dwarf hamsters can live happily together 😀
5. to pass all my pre-tests starting the 2nd half of the 2nd semester.
and then i have to add more because it is just so damn fun.


i’ve been very lucky for 2008. i hope i don’t jinx it. and i’m excited to see what 2009 has in store for me. hopefully no more tears.

i just wish that this year, me and james won’t argue as much. as much as i wanna change, i hope he changes top because he’s very difficult to be with. but i still consider myself very lucky and blessed to have him. i don’t know what i’d be without him in my life. he just makes life so easy for me and i miss him so much.


this year i promise to have my camera fixed..

tootlez.

hope you guys have a good new year.

…to the glass being half full. 🙂 HAPPY NEW YEAR!


come again soon.

2008.
in one word- FUCKING AWESOME!!


well, it’s finally 2009 and like the song goes “well this is the new year and i don’t feel any different..”. And i bet everyone i know is probably out at Vudu now partying and i’m home blogging. how delightful. :/

james tried to call me “daw” several times but then he couldn’t get through and it’s such a shame cuz i was so excited to great him and i just really missed him. i can’t wait til he gets home. which is hopefully soon.

as tradition, on the first day of the year i don’t sleep until 4 am because i like to stay up and blog about the year that has passed and i’m proud to say that this is probably my 4th or 5th consequtive year to do so. at first it started as the “longest blog ever” but then i just could NOT live up to that. it’s just too much work. so now i just like to sum up the year and then make wishes for the new year.

hence.

firsts first:

today i am happy because we went to sm to buy make up. you see lately, i’ve been watching “how to’s” on youtube and idk out of nowhere my girly side emerged and i’ve been dying to try out the tutorials.

i am also happy because i spent the new year with my family. this makes me happy because i’ve realized that in a few years i might not be able to even celebrate cuz i’ll probably have to work then.


to sum up the year 2008, i’d have to say it was pretty awesome. i mean despite all the fucked up things that has happened like with me and james and with me and my dad and his family, i’ve been soo blessed this year. truly blessed.

so let’s start with a survey that i’ve apparently been answering for 3 years.

new answers start after the + sign. thank you.

007/008/ 009 survey

1.Will you be looking for a new job?
– i will try to find another way to make money so, yeah, i guess.

* uhm, i think i’ll just add whatever i can think of aside from selling munchkins cuz i can’t do that in COLLEGE. so yeah, maybe. i’m always trying to find different ways to make money anyways. lmao.

+ no. i see myself as a nurse now. amazingly. yeah, i am as SHOCKED as you are.

2. Will you be looking for a new relationship?
– i don’t know if i wanna put myself in a “serious relationship” situation or if i like playing around. so, rightnow, i think i’ll take whatever comes.

^ i think i’m AWESOME! hahaha.

* no. i’m happy with the one i’m in now.

+ no. i love having a boyfriend. and most of all, i love james.

no matter what.


3. New house?
– hopefully. i wanna go back to apas.:(

* god knows how much i want to.

+ oh god. i wish!

4. What will you do different in 07?
– i will embrace everyday. i won’t let too many things pass me by and i will take more chances. that means, find the guts to sneak out.

^ i did sneak out ONCE. but i got caught. and i DID take more chances.
i fell inlove and fought for it. yipeee.

* this year, i’m going to live more. appreciate more, curse LESS, for once in my life i will be OPTIMISTIC!, care more, earn more,
continue to take more chances, pay more attention, learn to listen, control my temper better, love more, pray more, fight for myself more, be more independent, be better, be stronger, be smarter, be more responsible, PARTY MORE!, mean what i say more and i will not forget to ALWAYS BE REAL.
dami.

+ this year, i’m going to focus on my studies and try my best to be a better girlfriend. i just realized that maybe the reasons why i was such a bad gf to james is because i’m selfish. i’ll try to change that. but then again, it’s hard to break old habits ;]


5. New Years resolution?
– not to slouch
not to write on myself
wear more colors
embrace things more
etc. etc.

^ pffft.

* i don’t have any this year.

+ oh, you just have to wait for that. 😀

6. What will you not be doing in 07?
– kissing random boys.

^ AMEN!

* running away from home, getting into HUGE fights with james, slipping away from my friends, having PMS, cursing as much, loosing/ wasting money

+ all the things i said i wouldn’t do last year. hehe

7. Any trips planned?
– moal boal. but knowing my mother, that won’t push through!

^ did i go, ba? don’t remember. lmao.

* none so far.

+ anywhere. hopefully out of the country. 🙂

8. Wedding plans?
– aunt debbie

^ that i didn’t even bother to go to.

* mine
[because i’ll be turning 18 this year and i’m positive about wanting to marry James] HAHA

+ hopefully none of my friends.

9. Major thing on your calendar?
– PROM!

^HAHA. LOOK HOW FUCKED UP THAT TURNED OUT FOR YOU!

* GRADUATION!!!

+ the end of my first year of COLLEGE!

10. What can’t you wait for?
– summer and sinulog and mega parties.

* graduating, college, being 18, being able to party like a wild monkey and hopefully having a REALLY nice year with james.

+ good times. a life worth living. success in school.

11. What would you like to see happen differently?
– the player falling for the princess and the princess not catching him.

* my relationship with my family. i just want PEACE.

+ my papa’s health fully restored.

12. What about yourself will you be changing?
– a l o t

* a l o t

+ a lot

13. What happened in 06/ 07/ 08 that you didnt think would ever happen?
– HAHA. a lot!

* GOD. first, having a REAL boyfriend, leaving the house, maintaining my grades.

+ being hit by james…


14. Will you be nicer to the people you care about?
– uhm .. i have to think about it.

^ once again, i am AWESOME.

* yes. especially to my papa and to james.

+ oh yes

15. Will you dress differently this year than you did in 06/ 07/ 08?
– i hope i gain some fashion sense this year!

* if i can afford to then, why not?

+ i can FINALLY afford to so yes, it will.

16. Will you start or quit smoking?
– i might start. but i don’t see myself as a smoker, really.

*if i wasn’t so darn committed to my boyfriend, i’d start.

+ occassionally.

17. Will you better your relationship with your family?
– no. i don’t know. i just want my mm to shut up.

^ this’ll never happen.

* yeah, i’ll try.

+ so far,i wouldn’t change anything. i like how my relationship with my family is na

18. Will you do charity work?
– YES!

* yeah, it’s my humble pie. :]

+ maybe not.

19. Will you go to bars?
– yeah. i want to. i soo want to!

* yep. more frequently.

+ not as much as i would’ve wanted to.

20. Will you be nice to people you dont know?
– not that i’m ever mean to them but ok…

* yeah, i will. and i’ll spread somma that niceness on james.

+ no. people annoy me now.

21. Do you expect 07 to be a good year for you?
– i hope it will. i just want a good, fun year.

* yeah, i do.

+ yes, i do.

22. How much did you change from this time last year til now?
– i changed.

* oh so much. i can’t even believe i was so much more hate the world than i already am last year.

+ things have definetely changed, my friend.

now i’d like to think i’m more focused [!?] yet i’m also very much in vain.

23. Do you plan on having a child?
– hell no.

* still, no.

+ oh jesus, no.

24. Will you still be friends with the same people you are friends with?
– not all.

* most of them.

+ yes.

25. Major lifestyle changes?
– maybe. i wanna be a party girl. lol

* SEE JAMES!!!!
not major. oh, maybe major. i still wanna be a party girl. i want my boyfriend to be my best accessory during those times. i just want to be fabulous. [but i’ll have to be RICH first. haha]

+ yeah. maybe i’ll hang out with my friends more.

26. Will you be moving?
– hope so

* doubt it.

+ no, don’t think so.

27. What will you make sure doesn’t happen 07?
– giving away confetti

* giving away confetti. and the bad fights. and failing college or not fitting in it.
and forgetting who my friends are or who i am and my values and the Lord.

+ loosing my confetti. and loosing james.

28. What are your New Years Eve plans?
– it’s new year naman gani and im answering this. geez

* it passed already.

+ to stay up!

29. Will you have someone to kiss at midnight?
– that happens?!

* unta. but yeah.

+ no 😦

30. One wish for 07/ 08?
– that i would just have a good year. last year screwed me badd.

+ to learn from my past experiences and put them into good works.

january:

it’s always good to start your year surrounded by friends and i know i spent my first month pretty well cuz Bayot was home from new zealand and it was the first sinulog i spent out the whole night with friends AND james. god, i remember i was so tired that night and it was so whacked cuz we even tried to get a STRIP club but i just couldn’t do it. lmao.

i also remember that on sinulog me and james had to bring my huge bag of clothes around with us everywhere but it was sweet though cuz james took so much care of me that day. and in the evening, we cooked eggs. i remember that.

nina’s party was pretty awesome, too. crazy night. ;]

February:

VALENTINES! the best valentines of my whole life. ❤ i will never forget february for soo many reasons. mainly..

1. because of what james did for me on the 14th. 🙂

2. because i had prom! and the best prom ever, too. i was so lucky i got to wear my dream dress that cost us 5k. 2008 was really good to me!


3. because i got dengue 😦


March:

i think i was the happiest girl in the world during march cuz HIGH SCHOOL FINALLY ENDED and god was i happy that shithole was over.

high school wasn’t bad. i mean, i wasn’t a loser or anything so i don’t have any reasons to hate it but idk. moving forward just felt so good. and the best thing about graduation is that i didn’t just graduate but i graduated with an AWARD! but then it was the lamest. i got best in sports. harhar. 2008 was good to me indeed.


April:

april was good for me for 2 reasons.

1. cuz me and james turned 1 year on april 27.

2. cuz it was james’s first birthday that he got to spend with me and i was sp happy to throw him a party. a SUPRISE birthday party and the best thing about it all- it was his FIRST party ever. but i know there was some drama in between that but nevertheless.


and according to my files. april was also the time i won my 3rd championship in tennis 😀 yey me.

[layla’s 18th]

may:

oooh. may was awesome for me! i got my braces! [i know some people would dread this but then it was good for me cuz i always peeved about my crooked teeth and now they’re almost perfect. goody!]


i went to tuburan with just my friends, i got my new pets- chaka and cheeky [chicks. RIP] and my rabbits jumper and venom. venom died though but jumper is doing fine. she’s obese 😀

[jumper]

and what else? idk.

june:

start of college! oh god. june was kinda bad for me though cuz i was so fresh and everything was just really hard for me. hard for james too. i just lost so much once college started.

as for making new friends- now i have lesser friends than with what i started with. all my classmates are just difficult.

my camera got busted around june or july so i probably don’t have that many pictures to post na..

boy/ girl challenge? that’s a BOY.

july:

all i remember from july is getting a birthday gift for my mom that made her cry. hahaha.

august:

school consumed. August sucked cuz i couldn’t even go to chabels party cuz i got into free step dance team which btw, SUCKS and i had to dance. it wasn’t worth it.

september:
i realy don’t remember… maybe me and james broke up. most likely. september wasn’t that good.

oooh, now i remember. september was no good. me and my dad fought and are still fighting and it’s not going to end..

october:
oh yes, october. i am very lucky for october. first cuz cielo came home from the states and we went to nailon with james, ben, arden and nikki and had so much fun!!

second cuz i had an AWESOME 18th party! god, i am so lucky for this gyud. it was so awesome and it cost a lot too. i honestly did not deserve this but god was kind enough to bless me and i’m so happy for this god. best thing that happened to me so far.

and another thing that happened on october, james and i got back together and he ever got down on his knees and gave me a gold necklace for my birthday. i wear it on specia occasions. like during my party 😀

november:
somehow i just remember november as being very stressful. it was the start of the second semester which was very difficult.

december:
[hope’s party where i was OVER dressed]

december was good to me. i got really awesome gifts including a bank account from my dad and i get 4k a month which is my own personal money and i love it.

i got a tamaguchi, hamsters [which i love], make up and clothes.

james left for singapore though and that made me lonely but despite all these things i am grateful.

and that more or less sums up my 2008.
i know that there were many times during this year that i was groveling and moping and i know that all these reasons where cuz of me. me and james weren’t really in good terms for so long and i’m to blame for that. i lost touch with most of my friends because i gave james too much of my time and i’m also the one to blame for that.
there were times when i slacked off in school because i let my personal problems take hold of me and i blame myself for that. but that’s life. i’m glad to say “i’ve learned”

and the BEST part of this year is that…

i am OFFICIALLY, by law, on legal paper JEAN LOUISE I. PEREZ. Alvin Chua, you can EAT SHIT!


and so for new years resolution’s here’s mine in accordance to “this diary will change your life 2009” [benrick.co.uk] yes, i have the book..

1. to grow up to 6″.
2. to achieve COMPLETE world peace.
3. to gain an ass.
4. to somehow find a way that Syrian and Dwarf hamsters can live happily together 😀
5. to pass all my pre-tests starting the 2nd half of the 2nd semester.
and then i have to add more because it is just so damn fun.


i’ve been very lucky for 2008. i hope i don’t jinx it. and i’m excited to see what 2009 has in store for me. hopefully no more tears.

i just wish that this year, me and james won’t argue as much. as much as i wanna change, i hope he changes top because he’s very difficult to be with. but i still consider myself very lucky and blessed to have him. i don’t know what i’d be without him in my life. he just makes life so easy for me and i miss him so much.


this year i promise to have my camera fixed..

tootlez.

hope you guys have a good new year.

…to the glass being half full. 🙂 HAPPY NEW YEAR!


i am happy today because…

i went to the mall today with my whole family and i just had so much fun with them 🙂 it was really a blast.

and one of the main reasons why i am so so soo happy today is because of 3 things…

1. JAMES called me from Kuala Lumpur. 🙂
– it felt sooo good to hear from him after 3 or 4 days. he was on his way to Singapore and had to finish his credit because he got to Singapore cuz he couldn’t use it there so yeah. it was good to hear from him.

2. i got the new demi lovato don’t forget cd. it rocks.

3. and the last reason why i’m so happy today is because i got new white skinnies.


mommy said we’re going shopping at sm again tomorrow which is why i’m about to clean out my closet right now.:)

xoxo!

burning up

i am sooo excited for general cleaning before the year ends. i know i sound like such a neat freak but whatever. it’s not the cleaning i’m excited about, it’s the new stuff for year 2009 that i get to put in the soon-to-be open space. i sound like i’m not making any sense today. haha.

i just got pictures from james who’s currently in the airport waiting to leave for singapore from kuala lumpur and i have to admit, i miss him.

don’t have time to blog. ttyl 😀

new year tradition update: it might not happen. there’s a chance i’m spending new year’s at tricia’s house. oh the horror.

why me?

why me, god?
why do i have to screw up every little thing?
why do you always have to make me so unhappy?
why can’t i just, for once be ok?
why can’t i just be right?
why can’t i just, for once, be good enough?

why do i always end up here?
why, of all the places to end up- why here?
why here where i’m sad, alone and hopeless?

why me, god?
why’d you have to make me so dumb and small?
why can’t i be worth the fall?
why can’t i just make it through it all?
why me, god, why?


if you ever bother to read this, then you should know that i’m sorry. i really am.

you don’t care. i know. that’s nothing new to me.


40 little secrets

40 little Secrets

Be honest no matter what.

[ONE] Who were your latest 3 inbox texts from?

– James, James, James
.

[TWO] Where was your default pic taken?

– At the back of Nina’s car on Sinulog sa Sto. Nino.

.

[THREE] What’s your middle name?

– Inocencio

.

[FOUR] Your current relationship status?

– In a Relationship ?

.

[FIVE] Does your crush like you back?

– well, if joe jonas ever met me, i bet he would. lol

.

[SIX] What is your current mood?

– oblivious

.

[SEVEN] What’s your mom’s name?

– Cathy

.

[EIGHT] What color shirt are you

wearing?

– White mostly

.

[NINE] Would you kiss the last person
you kissed?

over and over again

.

[TEN] If you could go back in time and
change something, would you?

– yess, a lot of things.

.

[ELEVEN] Have a crazy side?

– the craziest ;]

.

[TWELVE] Ever had a near death
experience?

– yes.

.

[THIRTEEN] What is something you do a
lot?

cry.

.

[FOURTEEN] Angry at anyone?

– myself

.

[FIFTEEN] Do you wanna see somebody
right Now? who?

– yeah but then it’s no one in particular.
i just wanna be around people right now.

.

[SIXTEEN] Do you like drama?

– no. i’m anti-drama

.

[SEVENTEEN] When was the last time you
cried?

– this afternoon, in james car. i sobbed.
i bet he didn’t notice.

.

[EIGHTEEN] Who would you do anything
for?

– james and my papa and miguel, my brother.

.

[NINETEEN] Who is your hero?

– Jesus
and my mom

.

[TWENTY] What is the one thing you
notice first with the opposite/same sex?

– wallet ;] haha jp

.

[TWENTY-TWO] What’s your biggest
secret?

– my biggest secret is that:
i would be lost without you…

.

[TWENTY-THREE] Where is your ex?

– non existent

[TWENTY-FOUR] Would you ever take him/
her back?

– if he begged

.

[TWENTY-FIVE] Do you still watch kiddy
movies or tv shows?

– ALL THE TIME

.

[TWENTY-SIX] What are you eating or
drinking at the moment?

– nothing.

.

[TWENTY-SEVEN] Do you speak any other
languages?

– yes, yes, i do.

.

[TWENTY-EIGHT] Whats your favorite
smell?

– james. god he smells so good.
.

[TWENTY-NINE] Describe your life.

– fucked up


.

[THIRTY] Have you ever kissed in the
rain?

– yes. plenty of times.
and it rocks!

.

[THIRTY-ONE] Do you like the rain?

– very much.

[THIRTY-TWO] What are you thinking
about right now?

– what to wear to hope’s party.

[THIRTY-THREE] What should you be
doing right now?

– nothing.

.

[THIRTY-FOUR] What is your favorite
memory?

– church camp.

.

[THIRTY-FIVE] What are you listening
to?

– my sister coughing

.

[THIRTY-SIX] Who was the last person
you told that you love?

– james. and he didn’t say i love you back :[

.

[THIRTY-EIGHT] Do you act differently
around the person you like?

– yes.
honestly?
yes.

.

[THIRTY-NINE] What is your natural
hair color?

– the color my hair is now. ;]

[FORTY] Who was the last person to
make you smile?

– the people who sent my NSO papers

40 little secrets

40 little Secrets

Be honest no matter what.

[ONE] Who were your latest 3 inbox texts from?

– James, James, James
.

[TWO] Where was your default pic taken?

– At the back of Nina’s car on Sinulog sa Sto. Nino.

.

[THREE] What’s your middle name?

– Inocencio

.

[FOUR] Your current relationship status?

– In a Relationship ?

.

[FIVE] Does your crush like you back?

– well, if joe jonas ever met me, i bet he would. lol

.

[SIX] What is your current mood?

– oblivious

.

[SEVEN] What’s your mom’s name?

– Cathy

.

[EIGHT] What color shirt are you

wearing?

– White mostly

.

[NINE] Would you kiss the last person
you kissed?

over and over again

.

[TEN] If you could go back in time and
change something, would you?

– yess, a lot of things.

.

[ELEVEN] Have a crazy side?

– the craziest ;]

.

[TWELVE] Ever had a near death
experience?

– yes.

.

[THIRTEEN] What is something you do a
lot?

cry.

.

[FOURTEEN] Angry at anyone?

– myself

.

[FIFTEEN] Do you wanna see somebody
right Now? who?

– yeah but then it’s no one in particular.
i just wanna be around people right now.

.

[SIXTEEN] Do you like drama?

– no. i’m anti-drama

.

[SEVENTEEN] When was the last time you
cried?

– this afternoon, in james car. i sobbed.
i bet he didn’t notice.

.

[EIGHTEEN] Who would you do anything
for?

– james and my papa and miguel, my brother.

.

[NINETEEN] Who is your hero?

– Jesus
and my mom

.

[TWENTY] What is the one thing you
notice first with the opposite/same sex?

– wallet ;] haha jp

.

[TWENTY-TWO] What’s your biggest
secret?

– my biggest secret is that:
i would be lost without you…

.

[TWENTY-THREE] Where is your ex?

– non existent

[TWENTY-FOUR] Would you ever take him/
her back?

– if he begged

.

[TWENTY-FIVE] Do you still watch kiddy
movies or tv shows?

– ALL THE TIME

.

[TWENTY-SIX] What are you eating or
drinking at the moment?

– nothing.

.

[TWENTY-SEVEN] Do you speak any other
languages?

– yes, yes, i do.

.

[TWENTY-EIGHT] Whats your favorite
smell?

– james. god he smells so good.
.

[TWENTY-NINE] Describe your life.

– fucked up


.

[THIRTY] Have you ever kissed in the
rain?

– yes. plenty of times.
and it rocks!

.

[THIRTY-ONE] Do you like the rain?

– very much.

[THIRTY-TWO] What are you thinking
about right now?

– what to wear to hope’s party.

[THIRTY-THREE] What should you be
doing right now?

– nothing.

.

[THIRTY-FOUR] What is your favorite
memory?

– church camp.

.

[THIRTY-FIVE] What are you listening
to?

– my sister coughing

.

[THIRTY-SIX] Who was the last person
you told that you love?

– james. and he didn’t say i love you back :[

.

[THIRTY-EIGHT] Do you act differently
around the person you like?

– yes.
honestly?
yes.

.

[THIRTY-NINE] What is your natural
hair color?

– the color my hair is now. ;]

[FORTY] Who was the last person to
make you smile?

– the people who sent my NSO papers